So here it is, my blog is 1 year old today. It feels like I've been blogging forever, and like I have just started all at once.
So I thought to celebrate I'd post some highlights of posts I like from the last year.
March 1: Stop telling me to leave the hallway Felix, I'm not talking to anyone, I'm taking a nap. I sleep in hallways, I can sleep anywhere, such is the life of a student. Although, I will never sleep in CAB again, as Campus Security caught some chick giving a guy a hand job on one of the couches. What the fuck is wrong with people?
April 23: I'm so drunk. Drunk on my love for Nutella.. mmm chocolate spread. No wonder I'm fat, seriously, I never even had a chance. Today I had a mental breakdown because I couldn't for the life of me remember the 3 Laws of Thermodynamics. And then I started freaking out, because maybe I'm losing memory with age, but I'm only 22. Not good.
May 15: This morning when Gina called my cell, I found my purse neatly stashed in my underwear drawer.
May 18: Sometimes things are crazy. Like maybe someone at work gets arrested and then you get a secret promotion. I can't say for sure that that happened to me, the secret promotion that is, but I could certainly hint at it.
May 31: I accidentally licked my finger, and it had doggie medicine on it; it tastes just like tylenol.
June 1: "Ummm, Ummm, Umm proteins are good?" I would sit in my front row seat and fantasize about spitting on him.
June 11: We met a 15 year old named Matt. He wanted to know when we had accepted Jesus Christ into our hearts and lives. He sounded like a robot, and for awhile I thought he might be an alien.
June 25: We put our bags in the kitchen and I'm not really sure why we're there but there are palm trees all over the place. Then I get the feeling this is about drugs but I'm not sure. And then this guy is threatening me because I didn't pay him to swim with the dolphins. We get into an argument because in fact he is not a dolphin, so why should I pay to swim with him? And he's still wearing his weird little yellow hat. So then he's pulling a gun on me, and Jeff Goldbloom comes into the kitchen and is all "What the fuck?!"
July 9: Sharon from work woke me up this morning. She called to yell at me because the coupon sheets I've been working on aren't done and what is that status of them?
Umm Sharon, I'm on fucking vacation, and the fucking coupons have been in the booths for the past 3 weeks and were approved by super airport management way before then, so don't fucking call back ever again. That woman astounds me. Oh well, I know something she doesn't know. This other co-worker who just got fired, but who lives with her is sleeping with her son. Hahahaha how do you like those apples?
OK I'm bored of this.
The End - Happy Blogiversary to me
EDIT: I'm finishing the year
August 1: I only left the house to go and buy some alcohol. Probably that's a bad sign. I don't care. The alcohol was for my Baba.
August 23: If God created everything, what the fuck were the dinosaurs about?
August 31: Yesterday this crazy Moroccan guy that I've been talking to proposed to me and told me that even though I'm fat he would like to marry me.
September 14: New motto: fuck school man!
September 21: Angela and I walked out of our physics lab. *NOTE: this was the best moment of 2005 by far!*
September 27: So today I met Chad. And it was weird.
October 13: my first attempt at HNT
October 15: a meat hat? wtf? i mean, what about bears? doesnt a meat hat attract bears?
October 24: Then I open my eyes as the final layer of ice is freezing on top of me and I woke up FOR REAL, in real life I mean, because I couldn't breathe. It was the most fucked up thing ever.
November 14: This guy just walked by and he was talking on a cell phone, and he said: "You know what I just realized? That I'm thinking!"
November 26: My arm gets a mind of its own and spills a glass of diet pepsi all over my laptop. I start screaming like a banchee and pick up laptop to drain it. I start crying hysterically and try the computer.
December 16: OM-FUCKING-G!!! I'm in a frenzy. I'm in a fucking swearing hatred frenzy
April 26th, 2017 The Importance of Acting
8 hours ago