I accidentally licked my finger, and it had doggie medicine on it; it tastes just like tylenol.
My doggie got sick last night and I stayed up most of the night taking her out into the backyard so she could puke, then I went to work for 12 hours where I yelled like a crazy person at customers and then got mad because a coworker was joking that I have bad customer service.
One lady almost drove through my gate this morning, I yelled at her to stop and I scared my boss. She was like 80 and didn't put her car in park. She was confused why me and the building were moving.
Sometimes I wish all my coworkers would quit and I'd be the only one and then I could have a really big raise.
I'm scared that when I'm a teacher I'll swear at the kids, I've got kind of a pirate mouth.
Speaking of pirates, eye patches are fun.