I Won't Talk Turkey With Someone Who Don't Want to Talk Turkey

January 26, 2006

OK, I'm starting to think it's me. I attract crazy people. And today, I literally mean it, not in a derogatory way, just in a "this guy seriously has mental problems" kind of way.

This guy was sitting beside me on the busride home, he turns to me.

Guy - "Did you have turkey for Christmas dinner?"

Me - "yes"

Guy - "Poultry, meaning chicken, turkey, duck and geese are the slaves of humans"

Me - "ok"

Guy - "they're carted around just like people are packed into this bus. Did you know that when they brought people over from Africa to be slaves, the ships were called slavers?"

Me - "No, I didn't know that'

Guy - "Now I call the trucks that carry the chickens slavers. And I call busses Humaners. I went downtown to deal with my employment compensation and there were all these people in the building. I think the "institution" is like a human, and all the humans in the "institution" are like cells of the human"

Me - "ok"

Guy - "Chickens are our slaves. Would you eat a chicken if you were in heaven?"

Me - "ummm I guess so"

Guy - "Chickens in heaven is like having a lambourgeni (spelling?) You don't really need it but it's nice to have. I was going to tell this guy *points at a guy sitting in front of us who has his sweater hood pulled all the way over his face* that chickens are the slaves of humans, but he doesn't want to know about it and I don't want to tell people about turkeys if they don't want to know about turkeys"

Me - *Thinking to myself- I don't want to know about turkeys!*

Guy - "My psychiatrist is trying to get me free tickets to the citadel theater. That's entertainment. Entertainment for humans"

Me - "Yup they have some good shows there"

Guy - "Darn right they do, shows for humans"

Me - "Oh this is my stop. Gotta go"

I walked the rest of the way home.

7 comments:

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Okay, you win the Crazy Magnet award! Good job!

Stephanie said...

Thank you!

uglybutterfly said...

There's just something about today and conversations with or about crazy people on public transportation.

I've seriously heard this topic discussed about four times today.

Maybe I'm the one whose crazy...

ShyRocket said...

OKay, that was a bit off the wall...!

Anonymous said...

That's awesome. I love talking to crazy people- it's better than watching tv....as long as they dont follow you home :-P

Stephanie said...

I was actually a bit concerned, that's why I got off a few stops early. A lot of places to enter that had security if need be. I mean, I'm overreacting, but I was really uncomfortable.

Captain Rocket said...

That is rad. In a scary way.

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